The other day, I was chatting on the phone with a friend about my upcoming birthday in November when something she said struck a chord with me. It wasn't a bad chord, but it resonated enough that I felt the need to express myself.
It all started after I had just returned from a tea at a friend's house. We were catching up, and soon realized we were both yearning to escape Vancouver and fly somewhere warm. Excitedly, we thought, why not Mexico?! Since leaving my job as a flight attendant, I've been missing the thrill of jetting off to new places, so Mexico seemed like the perfect answer to my wanderlust and birthday celebration. It felt natural to embrace what so many Canadians do in the colder months—become a snowbird.
Fueled by excitement, I began planning a trip with my closest friends: renting an Airbnb, lounging by pools, and basking on beaches to celebrate my birthday. When I called one friend in Calgary, she was all in. We laughed about minor hesitations, like what we’d eat (tacos every night, of course!). But then, she casually mentioned something that threw me for a loop:
“Well, this gives me more time to get skinny before we go.”
I was taken aback, surprised that this was one of her first thoughts about a trip to Mexico—not the beautiful beaches, the people we’d meet, the fun we’d have, or the adventures we’d embark on, but how she’d look.
I quickly responded, “It doesn’t matter how skinny you are; no one else will be thinking about that,” and left it at that.
I recognize that this is her own inner dialogue, a reflection of her journey towards self-love and acceptance of her physical body. I’m not judging her for wanting to work toward this goal before heading south, and I fully support her in whatever she desires. But for me, it brought back so many memories—especially from when I go back home to Calgary—about body image. It's one of the reasons I believe I still stay in Vancouver.
I love the temple that is my body. It has changed so much over the years, and I deeply appreciate all it allows me to do in this world. Growing up in the 90s and 2000s, being skinny was relentlessly pushed upon us, exacerbated by the women around me. Fortunately, I was always active, which helped me not obsess over being "skinny." To me, feeling good was synonymous with being healthy and active.
Vancouver has been a place where I’ve truly come to love my body. The female circles I surround myself with here are largely body-positive, healing the collective wounds we’ve all carried. Of course, we’re not perfect, but there’s a focus on being fit, healthy, and balanced—not just skinny. That’s not to say everyone in Vancouver feels this way, but in my experience, the conversation rarely centers around being skinny. Yes, parts of the city can be health and fitness obsessed, but often, it’s more about personal goals than appearance.
This conversation got me thinking: there are so many other things I’d rather be than “skinny.”
I’d rather be happy.
I’d rather be healthy.
I’d rather be surrounded by friends.
I’d rather be joyful.
I’d rather be intelligent.
I’d rather be creative.
I’d rather be kind.
I’d rather be warm hearted.
I’d rather be adventurous.
I’d rather be sensual.
I’d rather be mindful.
I’d rather be courageous.
I’d rather be strong.
I’d rather be a good friend.
I’d rather be a vessle of divine manifestation!
As a female who survived the 90s and 2000s skinny obsession, I want to share that being skinny is totally fine if that’s what you want. But here's a friendly reminder: you are so much more than your body! Love your temple, treat it well, tune into it daily, remembering it is but a vessel handed down by Mama Gaia. You are so much more than the body!
With all the love n’ light,
Emma H